Which ten men should you never marry? Here are my top ten " Just say No" candidates.
1. He's been married five times before. Hold on, five? Everyone's entitled to a mistake but this looks like a pattern here. All his ex wives were at fault, all of them, really? You believe that?
2. You only met him a week ago. So you know all about him do you? His likes, dislikes, hopes, fears, mental and financial history, prison record and relationship history. It takes longer than a week to know some one. You may love them in a week, but you don't know them.
3. He's 45 and lives with his mum. Careful, this needs looking at. Why does he live with his mum? Is he a caring new age man caring for his aging mother; and now you get to look after his mother. Or is he a hopeless drip who never grew up? Could his mother also have raised Norman Bates? He could have good reasons, but find out what they are.
4. He's gay. OK if you're a man too, or you can live with it, but you're not going to cure him.
5. You've never been allowed to meet his family. Now why is that? Are they the Mansons? The Adams family? Are you a Manson or one of the Adams family? You should get to meet his family even if you never want to see them again.... ever.
6. You're sure it will be better after the wedding. Excuse me, no it won't. Whatever the problem, money, violence, a bad smell, its not going to be cured by a white dress and a hymn or two.
7. His ex girlfriends and wives are still important to him. Well of course they are, but check out just how important. You want to be number one in his life, not his housekeeper.
8. He goes missing. If you can't reach him, and he's not where he says he is, and his friends get shifty, where do you really think he is? Is this a pattern? I don't mean stalk him but if you catch him in a lie do wake up and smell the coffee.
9. He's a control freak who wants to know where you are every minute of the day, what you're wearing and whom you're with. Hold on a minute...does he expect you to change any of this when you're married. Is he pressuring you to drop friends? Change style? Not go places? That could be the start of something much darker. It's not a sign of love it's a sign of obsession.
10. He's at present on death row for serial killing fifty-nine women, and he says he only killed fifty-eight, and that was in self-defence. That should really speak for itself, shouldn't it?
Amazingly enough I can think of examples for all the above scenarios. Does love really does conquer all or do too many women enter in to marriage with a blindfold on?